Dress Shopping - Finding "the one"

I don't have an enchanting story about finding "the dress." Maybe it would be a more emotional story if my mother had been there or if my aunt and cousin started balling (I made sure that they didn't), or maybe if the dress was the most important thing on my check-off list. Even when I had a larger budget, the dress wasn't the most important thing to me––if you recall from an earlier post, I was all ready to rent my dress but FH was totally opposed. So now that my budget became even smaller, it became all about finding the one that fits everything––my budget and me.

I decided to start out with David's Bridal since they are very reasonable with their prices and I saw quite a few styles that I liked in their catalog. We were a little early for our appointment so we spent a few minutes looking at bridesmaids dresses. Then Erin greeted us, and seemed friendly enough. We sat down and I showed her the dresses that my aunt and I marked off from DB's catalog and she whisked dresses in and I began to try them on.

The first time I looked at myself in a gown I was baffled. I guess that while I daydreamed about getting married, looking stunning, the whole nine yards, I never actually saw myself in a dress or really any dress. I wear so few dresses, particularly formal ones, that I never really thought about how I would look. So when I saw myself it was a little weird, and to make it even stranger, I was wearing a strapless dress which did nothing for my figure (I looked fat! The worse!). Erin saw that I totally wasn't feeling the strapless and opted for sleeves from then on.

I also wasn't feeling the "poofy" skirt––I wanted to steer clear of too much fabric, particularly when it came to the train. I also was a HUGE fan of cap sleeves until I saw them in action (POUT!).

I loved the simplicity of this dress (see below) but it just didn't do it for me. My cousin came up with the perfect rating for the dresses, stolen from Coldstone's sizes: "Like it," "Love it," or "Gotta Have It." This was barely on the like it scale.

We did figure out that I really like the v-neck (which I always enjoy because it accentuates the right places. Then we tried mixed the cap sleeves with the regular sleeves. This was probably one of the worse ones I tried on (see below). This was definitely a hot mess.

Next up was opting for a halter top, which I was initially a HUGE fan of. But it was a bit much (too sexy) for my wedding day. Plus I didn't like the large jewels.

The next dress was the definitely almost the icing on the cake. And it was the first time I considered a longer veil (I was originally just going to do a birdcage veil). It was gorgeous!

The next dress was also a close call too, I just didn't like how the halter part of it sat so high. You can see how I added the brooch as an accent to the dress, which I really liked.

Hmmm...this off the shoulder dress looked almost identical to the dress in one of my collages. I toyed around the the prospect of this one.

My face lit up when they laced it up in the back so that it fit more snugly. Surprisingly enough I wasn't into laced backing (or whatever it's called) but it worked for me because it really gave the dress shape.

So this is the dress. I opted for the other veil so that I could incorporate color into my dress. In the pic it's red, but I ordered it in lilac.

The greatest part about it is that I met my budget of $300. The original price was $350, so I received $50 off. I did break the bank on the veil––a whopping $179. I know that it competes with the price of the dress, but it is a splurge that i didn't mind taking because it was one of the veils that I probably wouldn't be able to DIY, so I decided that it was a good investment. I did end up getting the undergarments and shoes from them as well. So my total ended up being $626.

Another pleasant surprise was that my aunt strong armed my dad to pay for everything. YAY! I will still have to pay for the alterations (mostly in the sleeves) and cleaning, so I will have to research my options (I hear DB is a bit pricey when it comes to that stuff).

What I LOVED about dress shopping was the undergarments. They felt so comfy and snug that I almost felt comfortable enough to wear them as outer wear!

The unfortunate thing about the whole day was coming home to find out that FH hit a deer :-(. I am glad he is okay. His car wasn't destroyed (thank God for older vehicles that are still made of steel). I was really sad that I didn't get him to tell him that I found the dress (is that selfish?). I was also sad because it is another expense out of his already small budget that may come out of our photog budget.

Despite the bad news, I am still relatively happy to get a major item checked off my list. Tomorrow I get to check off the venue, and hopefully the photography in a couple of weeks. YAY!

10 easy ways to slash your wedding budget

1. Have your wedding off-season.
I know you’ve probably heard of it before but it is so true. If you can, simply avoid getting married May to September, the busiest months. Make sure you avoid scheduling around holidays, though. Many companies and people have holiday parties and that can cause your prices to sky rocket and your options to be limited.

2. Have your wedding on a Friday or Sunday.
Many places will give you a bargain deal. But remember that if you have a lot of out-of-town guests, they may not appreciate having to take a Monday off to fly home. Also, I attended a Sunday evening wedding, which was very annoying because I had to turn around and go to work the next day. Keep those factors in mind.

3. Cut your guest list.
If you are being charged per plate/head, then the quickest way in some cases is to reduce your guest list. Keep in mind that there is no law that says you can’t have a small celebration now, and a bigger one in a few months or even a year or two after your big day. This may not always work though, as some places require a minimum head count or spend amount. In those situations still reduce your head count, but find another venue.

4. Have Brunch or Lunch instead of Dinner.
When I shopped around for a reception location, I found that places generally charged $10 to $20 more for dinner than for lunch or brunch. If you choose this option, make sure you know find out what restrictions they have on the hours. Many places stop serving lunch between 3 and 4 p.m..

5. Eliminate the Alcoholic Beverages.
Having an open bar or free alcoholic beverages can inflate your price per head/plate exorbitantly. Many “wedding packages” include this expense increasing the cost to and additional $20 to $50+ a head/plate. Also, keep in mind that the alcohol may have its own tax which increases the bill further. You could still keep the champagne toast and not break the bank. If you want to forgo the alcohol altogether, think of having sparkling grape juice or sparkling apple cider for your toast.

6. Look for all inclusive packages.
Try to look for package deals that include everything: food, beverage, decorations, flowers, linens etc. If possible, also try to find an in-house coordinator that can assist you in the process. This may save you tons. And best of all, you’ll have less stress trying to find a separate florist, bakery, and interior design specialist. Of course you should also ask to see pictures of previous events and ask for food and cake samples to ensure that your packaged deal doesn’t become a package nightmare.

7. DIY - Do-it-yourself.
With the Internet and television, you can virtually learn to make and do anything for yourself. This is a growing trend in the wedding industry, especially in tough economic times and people generally being sick of being over-charged for an item just because it has the word “wedding” associated with it. A number of projects include center pieces, veils, bouquets, food, desserts etc. Just make sure that if you choose to do anything yourself (or if you choose friends or family to do it for you), that the amount of stress and trouble doesn’t exceed the peace found in just purchasing the item/service. Sometimes intensive cooking could have be avoided with quality store-brought food. Also, make sure that you always have a back-up plan and/or budget and extra time just in case things don’t work out.

8. Seek out free venues.
What places can you rent dirt-cheap or don’t have to rent at all? It could be a family or friend’s home, a church hall, a club/center hall in which you are a member of, a college/university site, a park etc. Try to think of creative places where you can have your event. Keep in mind that some places like a park or someone’s house may require that you hire a caterer, tent, etc. If that becomes overwhelming, continue to seek out restaurants and other places.

9. Buy or rent a used or discounted/out-of-season wedding dress OR formal gown.
I know, this doesn’t fit every woman’s wedding dream, but sometimes the gown of your dreams is an added expense that just can’t be accommodated. Many people only wear the dress once anyway, so why deal with the stress of paying full price. If that option freaks you out (as it did with the FH when I suggested it for myself), then seek out formal gowns and evening wear that aren’t slapped with the “wedding” label, often making them much more affordable. Look at department stores that often have sales and dresses prices a few hundred dollars or much less.

10. Have the ceremony and reception at the same site.
For those who are adamant about getting married in a traditional church/temple/religious setting, you may be able to save a ton on exchanged vows at your reception site. Some places have packages allowing for this, so it may be good to take advantage of it. The great part about it, is that there is no need for limos to transport between sites. The only thing is being aware that it is awkward to invite people to the wedding if they aren’t also invited to the reception since it is at the same place. Also, you want to make sure there the site has good spots to take pictures.

Keeping these things in mind can help you set a realistic wedding budget without breaking the bank.


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Marquita Bell is the founder and product developer for The Body Buffet and lead photographer for Divine Image Photography. When she isn’t making soap or editing pictures, she is practicing more simplistic, sustainable, natural, greener living from food to spending habits. She loves sharing her frugal and simplistic adventures in hopes of inspiring others to improve their overall health and wellbeing for themselves, others, and the environment. In her spare time she enjoys refuting the term tree-hugger (how her best friend labels her) and explaining how she likes to “flirt” with veganism.

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